I got a call from my mom saying, “I just called 911, I fell and am in a lot of pain. I have to go now, the ambulance is coming.” Click.
This was highly disconcerting. Luckily – she forgot to hang up so I got to hear the emergency workers’ conversation about what happened.
She slipped on the stairs that resulted in a broken hip and emergency surgery.
Due to COVID rules we were not allowed to leave her room for anything, not even food. We were not told before we entered the room, and we felt like prisoners. I glanced at my dad and non verbally communicated we were going to sneak out for lunch later. Hint: once in a while, break some rules for your sanity. Also it is possible to nap on the vinyl couches in hospital rooms. Not ideal, but possible.
At 5pm the next day we were informed there was a delay and surgery would be at 6p. Hint: if you have control, schedule your surgery early in the morning – reducing anxiety time and time without food. When it is an emergency you have no control when surgery is set.
At 6pm-ish the OR staff was back to get her. They disconnected the tubes and got the bed ready to go downstairs. Literally they were about to wheel her out of her room and a nurse came to the door and said, “Wait, there is an emergency, you have been bumped until later.” You can imagine, there were some thoughts and feelings to be managed. (Hint: this is possible.)
Hospital staff tried to reframe the delay and told us to hang tight, the third time’s a charm. 45 minutes later the same OR staff is back saying, “Ok we are really ready now.” Again they got ready to transfer, the bed was moving. Literally, again a nurse comes to the door, “So sorry we have an emergency, you are delayed.” It is now close to 7pm, no food since 6am and my mom has been waiting for hours and hours. Patience is getting thin.
A little after 7pm again they come up for the third time. I could tell the staff was nervous to enter the room. We didn’t believe it really was going to happen but they got her off and we went to the OR. After two hours in surgery we heard from the surgeon. He said her bones were very soft and it took much longer to fix. (Hint: pay attention to your bones.)
Spending time in the hospital can be planned or unplanned. It can then go according to plan or not. Everyone gets to be patient or not.
Unexpected experiences like this make me a better coach! I can help make your caregiver journey more manageable. Reach out for a free consult so I can show you how you can have a life and take care of your loved ones.
